In order to break the monotonous routine I've come up with a few things you can do to turn a waking nightmare into a paralysing trance (which is marginally better)
1. 'BREAK-TIME ADVENTURE GAME™'
RISK FACTOR: Low
FUN FACTOR: 6/10
In order to play 'BREAK-TIME ADVENTURE GAME™' you'll need access to an unmonitored email account and an understanding and willing co-worker who will indulge your childish whims. In order to begin the game you first need to grab a random image from the 'net and then write a descriptive passage about said picture along with the potential for a developing storyline, characters and various actions that will transpire within the 'game'. (Admittedly this is alot of work for your tea break and some might argue that you've just swapped your regular job for that of a 3rd rate Hollywood scriptwriter, but no matter, truth is your imagination is your only escape from monotony - go wild) You will then email this off to your lovely co-worker who will then write back about what actions they will undertake within the scenario you've just created. Here's one I done earlier:
2.Whistling
RISK FACTOR: MED
FUN FACTOR: 10/10
"Thassit bitches - whistle while you work"
The inspiring words there of a certain Mister Walt Disney which eventually made its way, unfortunately censored, onto the big screen. It's a sentiment that still resonates with me today, as I whistle my way up and down the offices corridors and in and out of the elevators and round and round the ventilation system as I clamber through them on especially dark days.
Try it yourself.
3. Form an Elastic Band
RISK FACTOR: HIGH
FUN FACTOR: 8/10
Become the Office Cowboy.
Once this trick is perfected you are now able to take your like minded co-worker and have High Noon style stand-offs in the fluorescent glow of your crummy break room.
4. SNIPER
There's a sniper in your building - an imaginary one of course! Haha! This is a game for two+ players. During the course of the day someone is going to get pretend-sniped through the skull by a disgruntled former pretend-employee of the company.
You lose the game when sniped and this is achieved when a co-worker who is also playing the game shouts or mouths the word 'SNIPER' during the course of the working day. you are then obliged to make the necessary screams of pain and emulate brain tissue exploding from the half of your face which has been pretend-blown off. Combine SNIPER with game 3 for ultimate arousal. If you do not comply to the call of 'SNIPER' you have lost and are 'a dick'.
Risk factor is high during crowded meetings when calls of 'SNIPER' are most likely to occour.
Fun factor is low as you have been working in your office for far too long and the game of SNIPER is really just a cry for euthanasia.
