Contact: halloleftovers@googlemail.com



That's Good

My housemate/gal Friday says he was looking at old photos of me online the other day.

"Not in a sinister way" he added, slightly too quickly, and I saw his eyes dart to the left which as we all know from Derren Brown is a sure sign of fibs being towled (either that or there was something happening very quickly in the peripheral of his vision.)

"It was funny" he added after an uncomfortable beat "You look really different from just a few scant years ago, I couldn't believe it - it was like looking at someone I didn't know"

With my inbuilt Ego-stroking radar activated I look for my chance to avail of any incoming compliments about my (now maturing) looks as I slide into my late 20s - "I look...better Than a few years ago, right?"

A lengthy pause blooms in the conversation between us, causing a gulf of silence to bloom in the gap between us. In the dull quiet of my room I hear a car skitter off down the road past the window, the whinnying engine gradually ebbing away into the hum of traffic in the distance.

"No-you-just-look-different" the words slosh out of his face quickly and rain down on me. I purse my lips together tight and don't look up at him.

"Different" He again stutters, softer this time, as if trapped in an infernal loop.

Then he slips out of the room and I'm looking at old pictures and reaching for the gin and then maybe weeping and wondering what happened to my youth and its my birthday again soon and I should get around to all that stuff I meant to do and whatever happened to the years 2002-2008 what happened to them..

***

So anyway, I'm going to have to teach my housemate what to say whenever the inevitable happens and he and his girlfriend have a similar conversation in the future.