The Strange Tale of How I Shouted "Hello" At My Own Spiritual Manifestation From The Future

As I was about to sit down to do some illustration work today an unseen spirtual force traveled from the future and leapt straight into my svelte, toned body, and then slithered down my brainstem skidding past my eyeballs before setting off down my throat and squelching out a polite "Hello".

I could tell by the voice that it was me. Me from the future obviously. We got to talking and I eventually asked myself "What do I look like in thirty years then?" and was all excited to see the results. My future self got to drawing and this was the result:
After I finished crying, my future self left (He said he had to rush off to sign on for his dole). I went into my bedroom and looked at my svelte, toned, tanned body in the mirror and repeated the vow "I will never be that man" over and over, in between mouthfuls of Ice Cream and painkillers.